Sunday, 10 March 2013

Blog Post 4: MISSunderstanding


This happened about a year ago when a new Filipino helper came into my household.

One night, she had completed washing the clothes and decided to hang it out to air. My grandmother, seeing this however, was furious and immediately reprimanded the helper saying “You evil women!”. To my grandmother, a conservative, traditional Chinese, such behaviors cannot be condoned. For many generations, Chinese have held the belief that the night is the time when spirits roam around looking for a place to settle. By hanging your clothes out at night it is said to attract the spirits to reside within these clothes. This means that when the clothes are worn, the person would then run the risk of misfortune or being possessed. This thought hence caused my grandmother to see the helper’s actions as an act of bringing harm to the family. Conversely, the helper felt that her actions were perfectly fine and did not understand why it garnered such a response. To her, it seems logical to air the clothes after washing. This issue was later resolved by my father’s explanation and from then on, the helper adapted and never hung the clothes out at night again.

This calls to mind one of the 10 commandments to foster effective intercultural interaction - being aware of differing social values. Across different societies, different values, beliefs and norms are injected into individuals as they are assimilated into their societies. Therefore, when different cultures meet, one has to be conscious of these possible differences that can exist. As seen in the illustration above, my grandmother’s assumption that everyone shares a common cultural knowledge resulted her to read the helper’s actions in a very negative light, creating misunderstanding and preventing effective interaction.

Communication is one way that can assist us in learning another culture’s values and keeping misunderstandings minimal. As seen above, by our communication with the helper, it granted her the understanding of our Chinese culture, providing her the opportunity to adapt and prevent history from repeating itself.

As our nation continues to open its doors to foreigners, chances of coming into contact with someone from a foreign culture are high; we could even expect to be living with someone who is culturally different; in such instances when we hire a helper. Hence, being active in fostering effective intercultural communication and becoming more socially aware and adaptable would become valuable skills to possess.  

Reference (Images):
https://www.google.com.sg/search?hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1441&bih=646&q=maid+scolded&oq=maid+scolded&gs_l=img.3...1856.4872.0.5419.12.12.0.0.0.0.107.981.9j3.12.0.ekwqrh..0.0...1.1.5.img.5fS-Gcr5hBU#hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=shocked+look&oq=shocked+look&gs_l=img.3..0l5j0i24l2.7689.12535.11.12740.14.12.1.0.0.0.146.1322.5j7.12.0.ekwqrh..0.0...1.1.5.img.GvPv3Znyr1w&bav=on.2,or.r_cp.r_qf.&bvm=bv.43287494,d.bmk&fp=8470039fad555f73&biw=1441&bih=646&imgrc=k2z0GqmtNyL4-M%3A%3B-QS3ai6RIg1D8M%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.christineranck.com%252Fblog%252Fwp-content%252Fuploads%252F2010%252F10%252Fshocked_woman-700490.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.christineranck.com%252Fjust-a-spoonful-of-sugar-the-placebo-effect%252F%3B414%3B600

https://www.google.com.sg/search?hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1441&bih=646&q=maid+scolded&oq=maid+scolded&gs_l=img.3...1856.4872.0.5419.12.12.0.0.0.0.107.981.9j3.12.0.ekwqrh..0.0...1.1.5.img.5fS-Gcr5hBU#hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=old+grandma+scolding&oq=old+grandma+scolding&gs_l=img.3...5574.13163.0.13339.28.23.3.0.0.0.225.2494.12j10j1.23.0.ekwqrh..0.0...1.1.5.img.MP3EI00UQXk&bav=on.2,or.r_cp.r_qf.&fp=8470039fad555f73&biw=1441&bih=646&imgrc=1TBMpv91avsNGM%3A%3B2Z5_9tfVIxFTrM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252F3.bp.blogspot.com%252F-bzNYceJYUuQ%252FTpGXBaKLEGI%252FAAAAAAAABa8%252FIyzLcMZBm04%252Fs640%252F7571.scolding%2525252520grandma%2525252520610.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.lifeatwildberrycottage.com%252F2011%252F10%252Fmoms-proverbs-continued.html%3B610%3B436

2 comments:

  1. Hi stephanie!

    Your blog post is refreshing and it is very applicable in Singapore. More so, that we have diverse cultures. With the older generation being more conservative and many taboos it is a very real possibility.

    I hope they eventually resolved their differences and misunderstanding!

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  2. I had a similar experience of a domestic help we had a long time ago who insisted on sweeping the kitchen floor after dinner- needless to say, in our best interests because the kitchen needed to be cleaned after dinner- my mother-in-law was upset because it a superstition that if you sweep the floor after dusk, you are sweeping away all your luck and fortune:))

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